Friday, May 9, 2014

This Post Will Suck

I searched up my blog on Google images.  I'm quite pleased with the results.

Look at all these completely normal images!  

Anyways, I was just scrolling through my blog's pictures like a sexy person, when. . .

One of these is not like the others. 




I luv your blog, Audrey  ;)

This is probably the crappiest post I've ever made.  I was gonna talk about something interesting like aliens or the zombie apocalypse, but the soul of a conceited celebrity possessed me and demanded that I google myself.

To make this post slightly more educational and over-all more socially acceptable, I'm going to rant about the most stressful things the universe has imposed on the human race.

 AP tests.

I have a human geography AP test coming up really soon, and I'm already counting the days.  As of this second, there are only 4 more days, 14 hours, 39 minutes, and 11 more seconds until my brain graphically squeezes every molecule of knowledge from itself and spits it down on a paper filled with words like demographic transition, multiple nuclei model, urbanization, and agglomeration.  

Literally everything I've learned this year has lead up to this single test.  If I bomb it, every particle of hope I struggled to build up over this year will be crushed to smithereens like a fat 6-year-old kid in his 12 year old sister's leggings.

Even though like all of 1st quarter I either sat at my chair like. . .

(click on the gif if it doesn't work)

. . . I actually learned a crap ton of things from that class and I will be seriously pissed if I don't pass the test.

Long story short, I've read the AP textbook like two times, reviewed all my tests and free response questions nightly, researched problems in Afghanistan and other places on YouTube, invested in another AP textbook, done practice tests, memorized all the vocabulary, and I still feel like I'm not ready.  Basically what I'm saying is no matter how long I study, an ominous feeling of "I'm screwed" will always be in the back of my mind.

I think I should go back to studying.

Monday, May 5, 2014

20 Interesting Childhood Confessions

#1:  I was part of the "Boys Only" club in 2nd grade.

#2:  At summer camp I snuck out of my tent at 5:30 in the morning and jumped into a frozen-over lake because I was bored.

#3:  I had a reading competition with an illiterate kid to see who could finish the Harry Potter series first.  For what it's worth, I won.

#4:  There was a boy in my 1st grade class named Boomer.  I stole every piece of art he ever made.  I still have them.

#5:  There was this boy in my 1st grade class named Shaun.  I punched him in the nose because his face really bugged me.

#6:  I wore a clear "My Little Pony" backpack to school every day in first grade day just to show off my toy pony collection.

#7:  I used to climb on top of our neighbor's roof and pretend I was a secret agent.

#8:  I got falsely accused for cheating on a test in 4th grade and didn't even try to defend myself because I thought it was funny when the teacher was mad at me.

#9:  I told a kid to strangle Sara Williams, and he did.  He put her in a headlock.  I think she has problems breathing now.

#10:  On my 11th birthday, when I didn't get my Hogwarts Acceptance Letter, I cried.

#11:  I can actually understand lots of Korean.

#12:  I was bored in the middle of the night, so I snuck out of bed and covered my cousin in shaving cream while he was asleep.

#13:  I stuck gum in my mom's hair because I had an impulse to do so.

#14:  My old orchestra teacher used to hold meetings after school to discuss how he could keep my friends and I under control.

#15:  I used to have a Bob The Builder shrine in my closet.

#16:  One time I fainted because someone hugged me.

#17:  Actually, I fainted because I went on a candy-eating-rampage, and devoured everything within reach.  After I ate all the candy, I started spooning sugar into my mouth because I was hungry.  Then I hugged someone, and that's just when I happened to faint.

#18:  I hiccup like a dying mountain-man.

#19:  Sometimes I call my friends the names of fictional characters.  (Sorry Damaris)

#20:  Because I never got my acceptance letter to Hogwarts, I proceeded to learn all the classes myself.  I can now read Ancient Runes, know how to brew a Draught of Living Death, and know practically every spell in existence. I'm really proud of that fact.

Friday, May 2, 2014

Things That Annoy Me

This post is heavily inspired by this girl, so before I get arrested and thrown in a torture chamber for violating a bunch of copyright crap, visit her link.

Anyways, here are the things everyone does that annoy me to the point of no return.

1.  When teachers don't erase the board completely.

2.  When people have the literary ability of a toddler, and volunteer to read aloud in class.

3.  When I open a DVD case and a different movie is in there.



5.  When you ask someone a simple, trivial question, and they ramble on and on about everything BUT what you asked them about.

6.  When people say "What's up?"  (I never know what to say back to them.)

Me on the outside

Me on the inside

7.  When I have an itch on the bottom of my foot, but can't itch it because I have a shoe on.

8.  Couples that say, "We're pregnant."  No, sir.  You don't have a uterus.  Your wife does.

9.  People who don't clear the microwave numbers after they're done.

Credit for photos:

Oh!  And on a completely unrelated note, I saw Spiderman 2 today, and it was seriously mind-blowing and amazing on so many levels.  I highly suggest you go see it and we can become best friends for ever!!